Great film. Both Bale and Damon were brilliant. Told the story of Ferrari vs Ford well with some Hollywood elements added for dramatic effect. Cars sounded jizz worthy. 8/10
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Oceanās 8
It was OK. The only word you can really use to describe this film is ālacklustreā.
It had none of the charm, elegance or wit of the original Oceans films. The direction isnāt as stylish and smooth as Oceans 11 etc either.
Maybe itās because a lot of the film takes place in urban New York which just isnāt quite as classy and stylish as Las Vegas and Lake Como etc.
I also donāt think the female cast had as much chemistry with each other as the Pitt, Clooney and Co. and those films are almost entirely predicated around the interactions of the characters and their stellar chemistry.
It was OK, I thought the ending was pretty anti-climactic as well. They just steal the diamond necklace no problems and while itās creative itās not as much of a spectacle as the Oceans trilogy. It just kind of happens and thatās it.
And then there was all the lame feminist stuff. When theyāre picking their team they look at a couple of men and Sandra Bullock says no men because āMen attract attention, women get ignoredā. They compound this by having the stunning black girl covered in tattoos with 5 foot dreads in a beautiful bright red dress then walking around playing an important part in helping to get the diamond necklace out, yeah she definitely didnāt attract any attention.
Not to mention the fact that the rest of the team are all gorgeous and decked out in stunning dresses while literally every guy there is just indistinguishable from each other in black tuxedos.
All the marks are dopey men who are getting taken advantage of.
Why didnāt they make the villain a woman? Why didnāt they make the insurance person trying to catch them a woman? Why didnāt they make the guys in charge of the necklace at Cartier women?
That was all secondary to the mediocrity, but when youāre making a āgirl powerā movie like this it just seems lame and more of an āanything boys can do, girls can do betterā thing.
I didnāt hate it though, would give it 6/10. I love a heist movie, I thought Bullock, Blanchett and Bonham-Carter were fantastic in it and I appreciate the originality of wanting to steal from the Met Gala ball than a bank or a casino or a mueseum. Just lacked the same atmosphere and chemistry of Oceans 11, 12 and 13!
4 Likes
21 bridges 7/10
Good film had me engaged all the way through
Le manās 66 8/10
Great film the racing scenes are fantastic
Nah I was just lookin for a film to watch and it was on and thought Iād give it a go as weād been talking about it on OA.
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Jesus Christ you wrote a lot about that film.
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This is a greatly detailed review like one youād get in the guardian or something.
I demand a āCristo at the Movieāsā every Monday where you watch a movie over the weekend then on OA on Mondays you post your review.
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First up:
Charlieās Angels. 
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Cristo has his first film!
Looking forward to it mate
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Apparently thatās supposed to be a fun watch!
I was just thinking thatās probably the most thought anyone anywhere has given Oceanās 8
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Exactly, came out thinking it was gash and never gave it a second thought since. Until now, of course. And Iāve now spent about 3 minutes reading @Cristoās detailed review, other peopleās responses and then writing my own post.
I guess itās worthwhile circling back around for the sake of completeness - itās a gash film. The end.
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Poor @Cristo already has to watch us. Donāt make him have to watch and critique shite films as well!
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Nobody asked for that detailed analysis of Oceanās 8
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True, but Cal wants a similar analysis of Charlieās Angels, from the poor guy ffs:
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But OA is all the better for him having done so of his own accord.
Cristo > Kermode. :hipster:
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He got a like from me 
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Before that I want a 10 page essay on why Die Hard isnāt a Christmas film.
(because it isnāt)
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I donāt think Iāll be watching that tbf