This is too accurate for my liking
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Not digging this as your first post in like a month
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To balance it out, I’m very excited about this signing. I think it could be an incredible move, even if the lad looks like a stiff breeze could snap him in two.
He looks like you apparently, so is that how you describe yourself? 
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I’ve clearly missed something in the past few weeks lmao. Who lost their mind and said that?
Everyone
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This is the guilty one
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Fuck sake lol the man would have been spared that if you hadn’t directed him right to it
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Long time no see. 
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Fucking hell here we go, so it begins.
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defo an arsenal player
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We signed a player with a broken back. Nothing else will surprise me.
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Fucking pink stripes. Looks like our red faded because someone added bleach in the washer.