@Gio I know people who have found themselves in dark places and the advice provided above is all so true. Speak to somebody, anybody about what is going on inside your head. There is a small relief and comfort in letting somebody know and letting them in.
Time is the ultimate healer. Sometimes the pain never goes away, but you learn to live with it.
Don’t let the thoughts in your head take control of you brother. You have it in you to take back control.
I have no experience of that kind of medication, but certainly finding a professional that can help you work through the grief would be enormously helpful here. Cognitive behaviour therapy is an approach I’ve seen work for friends who have had very different problems with their own thoughts, and some of the literature around it might help to get to grips with some of the processes your mind is taking you through.
It’s not an easy path, but every step down it gets you closer to feeling better.
And talking to friends, and you have those here, is often the best help of all. I’m going to throw in a clip from the West Wing that I love just to illustrate the point:
Well update, she’s not been talking to me except this morning she fell seeioisly ill and had to be hospitalised. I’ve been struggling to function but I’ve still gone to work and gone skating today to keep myself occupied and try and fight through this horrible pain. I’ve tried to be there for her all morning with her over text as much as I could and now she found out I’ve been skating I get this vitriol and I’m blocked again:
“You’re not in a fucking horrible place you’re absolutely fine. You’re working, you’re doing things you enjoy, you’re doing things. You’re absolutely fine and will be fucking girls again in no time. I can’t believe I’ve spent days worrying about you when you’re just absolutely fine and still doing things”
She hasn’t spent a single minute worrying about me or she’d not leave me to struggle like this.
Yup, exactly what i thought you would get from her, remember i said she will hoover and then when there is something that she doesnt like you will be cast aside…she did it in quick succession. Yup she is definitely toxic, stay away from her she is messing with you bad you wont heal until you cut all contact. Dont let her use you emotionally then cut you off whenever she wants…she is shit testing you, if she blocks you it shows what she really feels, so this time when she comes crawling you do the blocking she WILL make you feel guilty for it but dont feel guilty she gives zero fucks about your feelings she only likes messing with your feelings its a big game.
Does she want you to be miserable so she could take some delight as to how much she was loved?
Fuck her.
Don’t listen to her. Keep yourself occupied by whatever means possible.
I couldn’t help myself back then because I had to sit & travel for long hours and the idle mind fucked me bad.
Keep yourself occupied and also keep your appetite up.
If possible, go for an adventurous trek or a playful date.
Best not to try to read too much into the way a woman is thinking or feeling my dood. I’ve learned long ago it’s a futile effort. They don’t think like we do, and have different motivations, it truly is a mystery imho. I’ll never profess to have an idea of what they are thinking or why they are doing what they do. You have to focus on yourself and your own happiness.
BULLSHIT. A lot of woman behave in a decent manner and to be honest that is a grave insult to decent women the world over. You are using a poor argument to make it seem like all women do this because they are ‘wired differently’ no, women know how to behave and how to care and love and be respectful.
This is how emotional and physical abusers get a free ride because of bullshit excuses like this. This woman isnt dumb and doesnt do these things because she doesnt know how to behave. She knew how to get someone to fall in love with her she knew how to treat him well enough to want to get into a relationship she KNOWS what she is doing, this is pathalogical in its nature…this is a troubled person and you painting everyone in the same brush and acting like there arent nasty people out there helps no one. his lady knows EXACTLY what she is doing and unless you experience this for yourself you have no idea how depraved this is…this is not normal behaviour. I dont think the Ladies on this forum or anywhere else will thank you for your stance on this.
Gio, something rings a bell actually with what she said in that message. Narcs, Psychos and sociopaths usually tell on themselves through projection. I bet you were really faithful to her right. Se has said to you that she feels you will be out fucking some girl in no time and you werent hurting…classic projection so in basic terms she is potentially saying ‘i will be out fucking some guy soon and i am not really hurting over this, she is telling her own story but pushing it on you’ They do this a lot accuse of cheating when in reality it is them that is cheating and they twist things around and make it that it is you that is doing stuff, classic tell! I am not saying this is a definite with her because i dont know her but this usually is the case, so watch out.
I’ve tidied up a bit here. Not the thread for these type of tit for tat arguments.
Mate, that is vicious and mean. She sounds vicious and mean. Seems like the kind of relationship that would cause absolutely nothing but pain and anguish for the entire duration.
Not worth it at the cost of your self esteem or your happiness bro.
Maybe vicious and mean or just jealous and immature. There is always two sides to every story, but the fact that Gio has at least recognized that the relationship is toxic, is a good step for him. I don’t like to judge ppl based upon stuff like that because if we are being realistic we’ve all said stupid hurtful shit and we’ve all had dark hours, and stuff that has driven us crazy. Best thing is to, as Sol said, learn to deal with the pain because in time he will realize how much better he is without that influence in his life.
My english is shite, can you explaine what tit tat arguments is ? 
the infliction of an injury or insult in return for one that one has suffered.
Happy International Women’s Day
Sorry was I being misogynistic?
I don’t think so, but I’m not a woman
Mate, I know it’s not what you want to hear but you are so much better off without her. Obviously it’s going to take you a while to get over that but in the longer term you’re going to find someone who deserves your attention and passion so much more. In return, you’re going to get the benefits of having someone that treats you the way you deserve.
Well here’s the fucking proof I needed that she is absolutely evil. I told her please not to get with anyone until after my birthday (end of March couple of weeks) got tinder plus to Change my location to where she is (psycho I know) and she’s come up on it. So clearly after something already. Fuck everything.
[screenshot of tinder profile and photo of ex deleted by Jakey Boy]
This kind of stuff checking up on her isn’t gonna help man.
I mean you got your answer, and she has basically confirmed she’s not worth all this effort and feelings you have for her.
Time to cut her out of your life.
Agreed just thought I’d share with you all what an absolute fucking evil bitch she is