You know what really grinds my gears?

My fucking gardener turning up a day early ad hoc, before the sun is up.

They day I need a fucking lay in due to one of those random nights where I can’t get an ounce of sleep.

Inevitably, I don’t get to lay in as the noise will wake the kids.

I pay him well for the fuck all work he puts in.

Well the joke is on n you motherfucker. It’s your last pay day. We’re moving the fuck out of town.

Or if you’re really sad like me - a Saturday night :joy:

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Why do these motherfuckers make it impossible to open their mouthwash. No other brand wraps the bottle up so much and so tightly. Bastards, be easier to get into fort knox


The officiating relating to when the ball is ruled out of play for a throw in.

Every time, without fail, if the ball is partially over the line, the throw is given, despite the rule being that the whole of the ball has to cross the line (as in the case of when a goal is, or isn’t given).

Taking people on trust for money for the euros sweep, then chasing them for it days before the final.


Xavi fooking Simons


Davros looking cunt.

Just seen this, can you clarify what you mean?

Like when people on facebook post something like:
“You thought you could fool everyone else, but I’ve got the receipts”.

That is taken verbatim from a fb mum on my tineline.

Oh. I don’t have Facebook.

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Me neither.

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Feet on chairs in any form of public transport


What sort of chairs do you have on public transport in the UK these days? Armchairs dinner table chairs rocking chairs?

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Musical chairs.

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I will always and I mean always tell someone to take their feet off the chair even if I don’t intend to sit anywhere near there.

It’s fucking nasty and inconsiderate.


Lorry drivers.

Seems an epidemic on the motorway at the moment where these cunts will pull straight across into my lane the moment they’ve indicated because there’s something slower in front of them, giving me seconds/feet to react and not end up a fucking vegetable.
If I can move right I will but regardless these fucking fat oafs will still pull out. Don’t even get me started on the speeding up where a slip road joins the motorway.

Covid/key worker status gave these fucks too much credibility.


And the cunts slipstreaming one another. It’s good, until some cunt jackknifes.

Ryan Reynolds and Dwayne “The Rock “ Johnson. Two wishy-washy cunts that just want your money.

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