So pissed off. - Page 2

CaptainCesc · 08-02-2010, 18:25

Oh dear, very sad to hear this mate, must be a really hard time for you since you've had this experience before...

Anything you say to him may not make a difference, but nothing is impossible, I just hope everything goes fine for you and your family.

Jules · 08-02-2010, 19:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by BradyMagic

I did try to make it clear that is wasn't meant as a guilt trip.

You know that, and I know that.

But someone who is that low, wont see it the same way.

dmxdex · 08-02-2010, 20:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by BradyMagic

Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind and I don't know what your brother's relationship is like with your dad but assuming it is good and he cares about him, say to him something like you aren't trying to make him feel bad here but ask how he felt when your dad tried it and if he was hurt and upset by it all, then try gently pointing out that his (your brother's) daughter will be feeling the same way if she cares about her own dad too.

You could also maybe try to diplomatically point out that he has other people like yourself who care about him and you and other family members and friends are the ones left behind to deal with the grief after he would have been gone had he managed to fully go through with it.

Anyway, that just my general advice and not meant as a guilt trip towards him and I genuinely wish you and your brother well and all the very best.

I failed to mention he is my half brother same mum different dads. His dad is useless. And dont worry mate i know what ya mean. Im angry at my brother for trying it despite him knowing my old man tried to killself last year.

dmxdex · 08-02-2010, 20:08

Thanks for the support guys, i agree with brady and jules both to an extent, i spoke to my dad loads and listen when he was down and at first it may lift a persons spirit with the wise words, it doesnt last. They have to dig them selfs out of it and stop feeling sorry for them selfs and allowing it to consume them up. In the end i went to see a shrink and im better now than what i was 2 years ago, still up and down, my girlfriend has helped me alot. Still i can get depressed when arsenal lose grr damn you arsenal, but i still love you.

**SWGooner** · 08-02-2010, 20:17

Sorry to hear this Dex. I've had thoughts along those lines before and it's something that you do well to steer away from. Fortunately, I think the photography gave me something to get over how I was feeling, so if you can find something fun to occupy time, that might work.

And yeah, the bloody Arsenal doesn't help one bit.

Hassan · 09-02-2010, 16:02

Quote:

Originally Posted by dmxdex2020

Thanks for the support guys, i agree with brady and jules both to an extent, i spoke to my dad loads and listen when he was down and at first it may lift a persons spirit with the wise words, it doesnt last. They have to dig them selfs out of it and stop feeling sorry for them selfs and allowing it to consume them up. In the end i went to see a shrink and im better now than what i was 2 years ago, still up and down, my girlfriend has helped me alot. Still i can get depressed when arsenal lose grr damn you arsenal, but i still love you.

When you got problems like these, you can't allow football to add onto it. It is something you have no baring over so whatever happens in football, please oh please try not to care TOO much about it.

gunnerpr · 09-02-2010, 22:22

Mate so sorry, my stepdad killed himself a few years ago. Fucking awfull, he was the reason i support arsenal my real dads a chelsea fan..... I understand what your going through it must be real tough, but you should be gratefull they/you have 2nd chances, i would do anything for a 2nd chance and be able to change something but you just dont know how bad it is untill they do it. You and you family should be gratefull you have this chance to put things right or make a difference.

GUNNER89 · 10-02-2010, 21:19

get him to do some activities he enjoys, quiz night, pub league football?

Forever · 15-02-2010, 01:14

Stay strong mate. Much of advice already has been given and there is not much you can do except for providing comfort and show him that you care for him. It is a tough situation and each person requires a different approach. Just make him understand that there is plenty of opportunity in the future and that he won't see it for a while, but will do so once he gets through the tough period (after a break-up and especially a heavy one like his with kids involved).

Keep faith.